Lala Tsusui (Oxford,UK)
I participated in CoCo25 with my husband and daughter as a family of three from Oxford, UK.
CoCo25 was a long-awaited and special opportunity for me.
Even before we got married, I had been praying that my husband and I could attend a Christian event together. After getting married and having our daughter, that desire only grew stronger, and I continued to pray about it many times.
So being able to attend CoCo25 as a family felt like God had answered those long-held prayers, and it became a time overflowing with joy and blessings beyond my expectations.
One month before CoCo25, I experienced burnout from a job I had believed was part of God’s vision for me. Exhausted physically and mentally, I eventually resigned.
Not knowing how I should serve God moving forward or what He was trying to show me, I felt as if I were wandering in darkness every day.
I despaired, feeling I could never become the person God expected me to be.
I prayed over and over again:
“God, I’m sorry. I can’t do it. I’m not equipped for this.”
Meanwhile, I was drifting further away from my career. Even though I anxiously searched for jobs, I couldn’t express my true value on a resume. I struggled in a world where my worth was measured by such surface-level documents.
With no energy left, I arrived at CoCo25 not knowing what to expect or who I was supposed to be. I simply came with an open heart, determined to focus on hearing God’s voice and not miss anything He wanted to speak to me.
Through the sessions and conversations, God repeatedly spoke to me about what He values.
Meeting mothers who were earnestly facing their marriages, parenting, and family life, I was convinced that this is what God desires.
I was reminded that there are things far more important than a career, and they were right in front of me.
God sees and values even the smallest, nameless acts.
No one else but God looks upon us with such great love, affirms us, and delights in us.
During CoCo25, God also asked me:
“What gifts have I given you? Are you seriously engaging with them?”
After CoCo ended, I took time to face that question with God.
As I began to see the path God was showing me, I became afraid of what others might think if I shifted from the path I had been on to the one God wanted me to walk.
I feared people would say, “She gave up on her dream,” and mock me.
Even though I had always prayed, “God, I surrender to You. Use me as You will,”
I realized I was only pretending to put God at the center. In truth, I had still been consumed by how people saw me, what they said, and how they reacted.
I was able to confess, “God, I am weak and sinful. Please help me become someone who seeks Your values above all else.”
God had already provided enough time, people, money, and the environment for me to do His will—I just hadn’t noticed it.
I had judged myself as “not enough” by the world’s standards.
I feel I now truly understand what Paul meant when he said:
“Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—His good, pleasing and perfect will.” (Romans 12:2)
It was simply that I hadn’t realized it yet—God already knows where, with whom, and how I should serve Him. And I believe the time for that has already been prepared.
Life is worship.
Whether we choose to listen to God’s voice, walk in His path, and seek His help—these are our choices.
That’s why I want to make my relationship with God the highest priority, the foundation of my life, more essential than food, clothing, or shelter.
I hope to connect with God as naturally as I breathe.
I’m grateful that the blessings of CoCo25 didn’t end with what I experienced at the venue, but deepened my relationship with God.
Thank you so much.
